by tamarjacobson

Quote of the Day:

Have you ever gone on an Internet-arranged date?

No, I am not interested in dating. I have a chosen family of friends. They include old lovers, who turn into friends. It’s so wonderful. All the brain cells that were dedicated to sex, they’re free for other things now.

You’ve always been described as "the good-looking feminist," as if the others were ogres. Does that bother you?

I wasn’t considered so good-looking before I became a feminist.

Gloria Steinem, interviewed in New York Times Magazine by Deborah Solomon in All About Eve. September 3, 2006

I have been thinking about how I quote other people all the time. Am I a professional groupie? Do I have nothing to say of my own? Or is it that what they say connects so well with what I am thinking and feeling I allow them to say it for me? Or is it that I think they can say it so much better than I – as in, a lack of confidence? Many years ago, my yoga instructor would tell me that each day he thanked all his mentors who came before him for without them he would not be where he was then. That was a lesson that has remained with me. Just before a presentation, new job, even before each class I teach, as I look out at the audience, students, or employer’s faces before me, I silently thank my mentors who came before me. In fact, one of the most fun parts about writing my book was the acknowledgments section. I was so carried away with thanking people who had influenced or affected me, that I wrote pages and pages. The hardest thing to do was to edit that, cut it down, shorten it and choose only some of those important people in my life over others.

Ever since I can remember people have affected and influenced, supported and encouraged, and reached out their hearts to me in different ways. I seriously do believe that I would not be where I am without them. Although kindness was always the most important characteristic for me, intelligence and humor was essential. As I head out on this the first official day of my new job I think of all of them. The list becomes endless, so I think it silently, whisper their names to myself as I shower, dress, drive, and when I face the faces today, my mentors will be right there, standing firm, like a chorus hailing and cheering me on.

Communities of friends and mentors have always been so important for my development. These days, that includes the blogosphere. Who would have thought that out there through ether and cyber space there is a community of friends and mentors cheering me on? So, I take you all with me too.

As Gloria Steinem said: "There is a reason why societies universally believe that the greatest punishment is isolation."

A year ago on Tamarika: Shame