tamarjacobson

Quote of the day:

The Book of Love by Peter Gabriel

Last week my therapist suggested that as things are happening, or during interactions with others, I might try asking myself a simple question:

"How does that make me feel?"

I have been trying it out. 

It is not easy for me. I first have to get over a couple of hurdles: 

• First, the feelings are valid, but more importantly, 
• it is safe to feel them at all.

It is a struggle …

I find myself changing the subject, or eating half a loaf of bread before I have time to realize I am feeling angry, jealous, disappointed, lonely, unworthy, excluded – whatever! 

The therapist is relentless. He brings me back to this issue over and over again, whether I want to go there or not. I really adore the challenge of it. Mostly I want to go there with him. After all, I returned to therapy after a break of almost 6 years. I knew I had reached some kind of space that seemed too uncomfortable to proceed. And, now, here I am, ready to push through. 

This is a big one for me. 

It is at the core of my authenticity.

And so, I am grateful not only that he gives me a safe space to work this out, but that he coaxes and prods me to connect with the feelings right then and there – at the very moment they are happening.

For, as difficult as it is for me, I notice that feelings are stirring. I am slowly allowing them to seep out and up into my consciousness, and bit by bit hold still with the fear and discomfort that accompanies them. 

A year ago at Mining Nuggets: Pre and Se … quels …

Quote of the day:

Patience and a mulberry leaf will make a silk gown. Chinese Proverb [From CCIE]

Yesterday I received my third ever orchid. How exciting for me!

But a little sobering too. For, my first ever early childhood cohort at Rider is graduating and moving on, out and up into the world of work – reality? Yes indeed, it has been four years already. My, how the time is flying by!

What can I say?

I will miss these humorous, loving, question-posing, compassionate, creative young women. Very much.

But, at least, I will be able to watch the orchid grow and bloom, reminding me of them day by day, and wishing them well with productive, fulfilling, and happy days ahead!

Mother's Day came early for me … 

And, look! I had my hair cut – again – for the occasion:

 My … how I've changed … in just one year … 

Found at The Obvious.

Quote of the day:

I try to be cynical, but its hard to keep up. Lily Tomlin famously said (in Jane Wagner's The Search For Intelligent Life In The Universe … ) From an email exchange with a colleague today.

Check out three blog posts that I enjoyed reading today:

1. At The Huffington Post,

2. At The Obvious, and

3. At How to Find Real Food.

A year ago at Mining Nuggets: Giving it all away

Rain is falling in bucket loads. Storming and battering, splashing and pounding.

I start to giggle. No four-mile walk for me today. Instead, I have time to write a blog-post before setting out to work. 

How strange to look for excuses not to exercise. However, some days I am unable to find time to fit in all the things I love doing. 

I remember a story that my mother told me about when I was a pre-toddler – fifteen to eighteen months or so. At night, after I was put to bed, instead of going to sleep, I would stand up in my crib and strain to see what was going on in the living room, and call out to be included. It seemed that I have always wanted to be part of the action! 

I have always wanted to do and see it all.

Well, I suppose I could jump in the car and speed off to the gym on my way to work. 

But I just wanted to touch base with my blog first. 

Because, it seems that so often Twitter, Facebook, four-mile walks, yoga, reading, and writing other stuff (other than my blog – I mean) – oh yes, and even working: teaching, meetings, committees, presenting, traveling – get in the way of blogging.

Or, are all those … just excuses, excuses … ?