Feeling good is good enough

by tamarjacobson

I must say that lately it seems that feeling good has become relentless … I mean, it just keeps coming back stronger than before even and in spite of the obstacles I try to put in my way.

Indeed, I am amazed at how versatile my mind is in coming up with ways to make me feel bad essentially only minutes after I feel empowered, joyful, or just plain happy. Headaches; anxiety attacks; chest pains; regrets; guilt about being a bad mother, pet owner, wife, friend, human being; general nostalgia and longing; self-loathing; fits of desperate hunger, only moments after I have eaten a full meal; and tensions in my neck and shoulders so deep that a massage therapist recently almost broke her wrists trying to drive out of me!

I am beginning to understand the full extent of the power of my mind-body connection, and it is awesome. As if on a bumpy roller coaster ride, noisy, painful, and even terrifying at times, I soldier on through pushing any ailments or rising negative feelings aside, allowing myself to feel good over and over again.

This is it, I imagine. If I am able to weather this storm long enough with as much courage and strength as I can muster, I am bound to reach peaceful waters, where I might float quietly, bobbing and up and down with a few mild ripples caused by a gentle breeze only now and then.

Eight years ago at Tamarika: Oh, may they hear me calling (Update) & I dream of Dali

A year ago at Mining Nuggets: Foreign flower